Bald
Bald, bold and beautiful!
I have been living my life as a bald woman for over 6 years now but I honestly do not go outside without my wig that often. One reason I don’t is because in addition to having Alopecia Universalis (complete hair loss on the entire body), I also have a form of Cicatricial Alopecia. Cicatricial (which means scarring) alopecia refers to a group of rare disorders which destroy the hair follicle and replace it with scar tissue, thereby causing permanent hair loss. As a result of this, I have blotchy colored skin on my scalp. In order to create an even tone all over my head, I have to apply make up all over it. This is a time consuming procedure that I only entertain when it is time to wow the crowd. Other than that, I prefer to cover my crown and save myself the expense of buying new foundation every week.
Bold
I recently took a bold step outside of my own comfort zone as a personal challenge. On November 21, 2009, I attended the Radio One Media & Entertainment Conference in Raleigh, North Carolina. It was the place to be for anyone looking to work in any facet of the entertainment industry. The downtown Sheraton hotel was filled with local aspiring artists, record label executives, well known music producers, successful entrepreneurs and keynote speaker, Andre Harrell himself. It was an amazing event and provided everyone with a wealth of valuable information and networking opportunities.
The Bold part of the story, is that I decided to attend this diva-liscious event au natural! I did not wear my wig but I did wear my confidence and determination. It was a wonderful challenge and a great gift to myself to step out a little further and put my money where my mouth is. The reward was priceless. I only stand 5 feet in stature but on this day, I felt 6 feet tall and quite comfortable in my new tall skin.
Beautiful
A line in one of my favorite poems by Marianne Williamson reads like this:
“As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same thing.
As we are liberated from our own fears, our very presence, automatically liberates others.”
Part of the reason I decided to go out to an event for an industry that glorifies the carbon copied, barbie doll standard of beauty is because I wanted to make a statement. I decided to let my light shine so that my presence may liberate others. There were some stares as you can imagine as I was the only bald woman in the building but I returned each glance with love.
When you decide to embrace the thing that makes you different, you never know how many people will be inspired to free themselves and do the same thing. Everyone may not come up to you and verbalize how your presence impacts them and you do not need them to. Your assignment is to lead from the front.
During the conference, I went to the ladies room to fix my make up. A woman I shared a mirror with just came out and said, “You are bold!” I smiled knowingly and said, “I have been told that before but this style is not by choice. I just do what I have to do.” She replied, “Well, I guess I should not complain about the few gray hairs I found on my head this morning huh? ” I said, “Girl, I would kill for a few gray hairs right about now.” We laughed and shared a moment of truth as we looked at our reflections staring back at us in the mirror.
She was beautiful with a few gray hairs and I was beautiful with no hair at all.
You go, Sandra!!! I wish I could have been there. You do have a boldness and inner strength that exudes confidence that is out of this world!!! I am so proud of you, and am honored to be your friend. Peace and Blessings!
Back at you Lady L! Thank you for your kind words and for being a wonderful friend.
Happy New Year – Sandra – you new friend – glad I found ur website ! I like your points mentioned above! I will apply them this year and keep tract in my journal! God Bless
‘I did not wear my wig but I did wear my confidence and determination.’”
I love this.
I’m a black woman with alopecia and boy i’m having a hard time dealing with it. I miss my hair so much!!!!! I cry a lot.
I feel you. It is all part of the process so be gentle with yourself. Some days I wake up and feel frustrated even after 11 years of having Alopecia. It sucks when you do not have any control over the way you look. Somehow we have to learn to love and accept ourselves whether we like it or not. That is a tall order but when it is all said and done, this experience will teach you how to tap into, love and appreciate the real you. You are not alone. We are walking it out together. Thanks for sharing your heart with me. Be strong and stay connected.
I really enjoy your song “I”m beautiful”. I were diagnosis last year with alopecia areata and I’m still having a time trying to adjust to my new look. You have really encourage me. Keep up the great work.
Thank you. I am glad I was able to help. Reach out anytime. We’re in this thing together!
Hi I have been losing my hair too. I feel so depressed all the time.I feel like no one understands me
You are not alone. There are so many people that go through this experience. Men, women and children. Be encouraged and know that your hair is not what defines you and you will be just fine.